Those who can't do, teach. And those who can't coil themselves around a stripper pole as nimbly as they used to, judge.
Just ask Steven Tyler. Or better yet, Britney Spears, the latest (but surely not the last) mileage-afflicted pop tart to be courted by a reality-TV competition: Simon Cowell's extraneous, buzz-kill The X Factor.
Cowell is understandably eager to land a "name" as a new judge, a la Christina Aguilera in
